Amy's here!

My friend Amy is here on a 2-week visit from our homeland, Taiwan.

She has missed Canada and our foliage.

So I decided to wash my Vibrams in honour of her arrival. Just kidding. That makes no sense.

I was running through some rainy weather last week, so it was a disgusting chore. Luckily, I don't have a picture to share with you. You're welcome.

That's my excuse for not running today. That, and that I was busy doing stuff like this:

After lunch with our working girlfriends, we had dessert at Prairie Girl Bakery.

The artistry in my iPhone photo astounds you? Yes, it astounds me too.

Being the addict I am, I had to have Red Velvet Cupcakes with Classic Cream Cheese Frosting.

There is nothing in the world like a fresh cupcake. My only fault with the cupcake was that it's severely top-heavy.

 

Amy and I gave up on the grab and bite method and asked for forks. Much easier. I polished off every drop of cream cheese frosting. Oooohhh baby.

By the time I got home, my Vibrams were STILL wet, so naturally, I took Steven out for a nice dinner at Pizza Nova. Then, we walked to the Yonge/Sheppard Yogurty's. 

Steven and I are big Mochi Ball hogs, and both of us immediately noticed that the Balls at Yogurty's are not as chewy and bouncy as the ones at Menchies. Plus, Steven's yogurt melted really fast (maybe because he gets supermodel-on-a-diet portions), so that was annoying. The mango pieces tasted weird to me, but maybe that's because I mixed it with hazelnut froyo...and my tastebuds exploded in confusion.

Hello Interwebs! How did you spend your Wednesday?

This is a whole new world of sore

I did pretty well on my weekday runs this week.

I ran 3.67 on Monday, 3.24 on Wednesday and 4 miles even on Saturday. All of them were relatively easy, but definitely pushing my endurance (and do-not-vomit) limits.

Thursday morning was a whole new world of pain. There was a pulling, nervy, tight sensation in my right hip, which abated as soon as I stretched it. It launched me into a 30 minute yoga thing with lots of groaning, moaning, and concerned Two-Two love-snuffles.

In other news, it rained all Friday and Saturday.

This is a picture of the Dirt Sponge's paw after a wet walk.

If you can't tell, the grass is threaded into her hair. *sigh*

The Olympics have tired me out. Just the thought of a 2:08 marathon, a 1:46 10K open water swim, and throwing javelins (in today's world, a very necessary life skill), I needed to carb load.

This is a picture of my cravings-come-to-life.

The green stuff on the bottom is spinach (a.k.a. guilt). 

Now I sit, the neon-orange chemicals permeating my skin, plunging my body into a toxic carb coma of preservatives and pseudo-cheese sauce.

I am satisfied.

Goal of the week: MORE ASHTANGA!

Full Lotus Morning!

No, that's not my new spiritual name.

But this weekend, for the first time EVER, I got into full lotus pose without any pain.

It's a big moment for me. Really, it is.

I'm so happy I drew you a picture of my dog!

Yes, I know she is sad, but I'm happy! HAPPY!

Unfortunately, dear dog, the answer is no.

I imagine she is angry, and possibly plotting her revenge...

 "Little do you know, Human, that my tail is a high-frequency ANTENNAE. I am sending out an SOS to the mothership. When my brethren return for me, we shall exert mind-control over your SCISSORS contraption and do unto you as you have done unto me. AN EYE FOR AN EYE! EAR HAIR FOR EAR HAIRRRR!!"

And so, the battle between Human and Alien-Dog continue....

Sunday night, I tried my hand at Olive and Mushroom burgers. 

I'm pretty happy that they looked like burgers, even though they tasted like olives.

  

Jenbeans made quinoa salad and na'an-like possibly-pita bread stuff. Delicious! 

Then, Monday night, Steven took me to Menchies and we shared this gorgeous thing: 

  

I love mochi balls almost as much as I love my radioactive Alien-Dog! <3 <3 <3

It's been a good long weekend! What did you do all weekend?

Why do some yoga teachers have "spiritual names"?

I am publicly admitting it.

I think poorly of teachers who publicize their "Spiritual Name."

Very poorly.

As poorly as I think of "Snooki" or "The Situation."

There is disdain, judgment, and scorn thrown in there.

Don't get me wrong. I think most yoga teachers with spiritual names are probably good at their job.

And maybe that's why people don't guffaw when they announce that they want to be called Sunshine Child of the Everlasting Elephant.

To me, the "Spiritual Name" is like a label. It screams, "I'm so legit, I'm oh-so-legit, now pay me more money to teach you some simple postures that you can find online for 1/4 the price!" It's a marketing gimmick.

Which leads me into the whole marketing gimmick of The Yoga Teacher. The earth-friendly products. The perfect skin. The eternal youth and bulging deltoids (yes, I'm jealous). The demi-gods who don't have one negative thought, whose response to a hard question is always easy and flowing but doesn't really make any sense, whose actions are in perfect harmony with YOGA.

It's not fair.

And worse of all, I realize the necessity of playing into this marketing gimmick. Most teachers work very hard for very little, and any sort of publicity that will give them work (i.e. food, rent, bills, dog toys), is part of the work.

But no one sees this.

I'm not saying that Oh-My-Life-Is-So-Hard-Pity-Me-I-Lack-A-Spiritual-Naaaammmmmeee!

No, no. I just wish more people would be willing to show the world that yoga, teaching it, doing it, is not easy.


So I propose this: a marketing gimmick that shows yoga teachers doing everyday things. Things that people do, like:

• - struggle with body image and diet
• - fail at forgiving someone
• - feel lonely and friendless
• - forget important things 
• - lack appropriate tact (a.k.a. say the wrong thing at the wrong time) 
• - spill secrets
• - rail on someone for some stupid inconsequential little thing and then regret it later
• - regret, regret, regret
• - not have enough money and get a second job
• - get on their hands and knees and clean their bathroom
• - get hungover
• - watch The Real Housewives of Vancouver (that shit's addictive!)

I want a marketing campaign so far away from the enlightenment of "Sunset Sea Turtle In the Mist" that it looks like normal people doing normal things and sometimes f*king up. Because that's what being human is all about.

And humans are far more interesting than "Loving Lotus Blossom In Harmony with the World."



What would you like to see yoga teachers do in my awesome new marketing campaign?

Anyone else think "spiritual names" are stupid?

There is nothing wrong with cake for breakfast

I woke up sore from yesterday's easy 2 miles (stopping every 10 seconds to pee beneath a tree... yeah, I brought the dog. Longest 2 miles of my liiiiifffeeeee). I have been yearning for a non-Ashtanga non-yoga day, and feeling really guilty about it.

I ate cake for breakfast and went back to sleep.

And then I swam in the pool and forgave myself 10% for skipping Ashtanga, because at least I did something that set my breath to a regular rhythm, something where I exercised that equal measure determination, form, and meditation that Ashtanga requires.

Plus, swimming gives you this, "That was good for you," feeling.

Let's take that up to 15% forgiven.

After my swim, even my hips and legs felt looser, like I stretched them even though I didn't.

On a completely different note, I bought these babies a few days ago. 

I had hoped to insult Jenbeans with this purchase. Maybe she'd see store-bought burgers as an insult to her culinary expertise. And proceed to make some AMAZING new gourmet veggie burger.

No such luck.

She thought it was a great idea. *sigh*

We fried them up tonight. Jen-sister made her own delicious olive pita, I made tzaziki and corn slaw. And it was delicious.

What are you eating for dinner tonight?

3 AM and Red Velvet Cake

          2.38 miles.

          The dog woke me up at 3 AM sounding the bark alarm.

          "Perimeter breach at Sector 1A (Front Door)," she informed me when I stumbled downstairs.

          I tied her up.
 
          I had to be up at 4:30 anyway to drive Steven to the airport, so I was grumpy. Especially since she went back to sleep but I couldn't. NOT FAIR.

          Luckily, my run went well, so that cheered me up. My pace is slower than last week, but at least my distances aren't lagging too far behind. Forever optimist, that's me.

          When I got home, I found Jenbeans' latest creation on the stove, a boule of some sort, baked in the cast iron. So cut myself a slice, fried up an egg with tomatoes, parsley and arugula. Oh, and cheese. Mmm, cheese.

          In the afternoon, I did 750 meters in the pool pretending I'm Michael Phelps. Zoooom!

This is what I did tonight as I worked on some editing for my job.

          Never leave me, Red Velvet Cake. I <3 you.

Weekly to "Daily", aka, when I feel like it

Here are the poor orphaned bits of writing this week so far...

Sunday
          2.07 with 1 min walking break in sweltering 11:30 AM heat. This was a bad idea.

          I wore my pink yoga tights to run, and a lady running opposite pointed at me with a huge grin and said, "You look like CANDY!"

          Ahh, runners.

Monday
          Too much Ashtanga. Pooped.

Tuesday
          1.55 with the canine runner.

          She ran into a burr bush and I had to cut away half of her right ear hair. *sigh* How are you ever going to find a mate like this, Two-Two?!

          
          There were a couple of runners ahead of us, and Two raced ahead to get at their heels. She darted left, darted right, left, right, right left, sniffed their ankles, until one of them noticed and started laughing. It's so nice having a canine friend along for the ride. Especially one that makes human friends so easily.